Edible Aphrodisiacs
Food guaranteed to start a fire.
You won’t believe some of the things men have had the nerve to bring to the table through the ages in an effort to get a honey to give it up. A bowl of green M&Ms is okay, but bull testicles? Sheep’s blood? Lizard flesh? Unless you’re vying for the Iron Chef title, or have easy access to hot tongs and a pasture, we suggest you lay off the When Animals Attack appearances and head to the grocery store instead. Here’s a list of slightly more practical ingredients to slip into her (or his) main course and hopefully kickstart the sheet-sliding. And while experts disagree on whether aphrodisiacs really increase your “amour,” it’s never a bad idea to add something new to the menu – especially for special occasions.
Oysters
Yes, it’s a cliché to pop a few of these onto a plate with a little garnish and a cock-eyed grin, but the Romans had it right. What says “sex” more than raw, slimy and open wide? The common theory was that these sea creatures resembled female genitalia, and the ancients reported maidens gyrating wantonly after sliding a few giant ones down their throats. They don’t call them Oysters Rock-a-fella for nothing.
Chili Peppers
Hot, hot, hot. Just remember not to add too many of these to your dishes or it’ll be your ass in the hotseat as your intended downs a gallon of water and cusses you out. Ancient tribes used these to arouse passion and get the juices (tears, saliva, etc.) flowing. A red chili paste added to a fish dish or risotto, followed by a tall glass of milk, should have her steaming up your glasses in no time.
Saffron
Saffron is another expensive item designed to show how much you care, usually packaged as a dark yellow powder and included in many pungent Thai dishes. It’s known to act as a sedative, lulling you both into love. But be warned: Excessive doses are said to cause uncontrollable laughter. That’s the last thing some of us want to hear in the bedroom later.
Pine Nuts
Zinc is a key mineral that maintains male potency – a sort of natural Viagra – and pine nuts are loaded with it. Pine nut cookies and dark espresso for dessert have been rumored to give your sexual stamina a big boost. Enough of these fattening little treats and there’ll be plenty of both of you to enjoy, so indulge.
Cocoa Beans
Chocolate is a drug, okay? Hardly anyone is able to resist the simultaneous buzz and feeling of relaxation that a rich dark piece of this caffeine-related substance can give you. When served with a superior vintage wine – well, you might as well just turn yourself in to the police right then and there, because you’re dealing in ecstasy. Sprinkle some cocoa beans, the “nourishment of the gods” as the Aztecs used to call them, over your valentine’s ice cream. Cover your naked bodies in a thick syrup and make your own banana split. Whatever floats your boats.
Strawberries
Even skinny chicken lips can be made to look thick and luscious after a few of these velvety, ruby-red beauties. And if some of the sweet, sticky juice dribbles accidentally onto your shirt – well, you’ll just have to take it off, won’t you?
Saw Palmetto
Here’s one for the health freaks. A little palm oil and he’ll be putty in your hands, due to the vigor-enhancing minerals it contains. It can also be taken in pill form. Saw Palmetto has been ascribed euphoric and healing properties, plus high amounts of estrogen, so he’ll see your side of things. It’s also said to make breasts grow larger, although that could just be the wine.
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